With Friends Like These…

I’m not a perfect person by any means. I have good intentions and do my best to be positive and talk about people among professional colleagues and peers saying the exact same thing I would say to them to their face. For a long time I believed that people followed a similar mantra. They were honest and forthright. I was wrong.

Sometimes people have a hard time believing that I am genuine. I don’t begin a conversation with a hidden agenda or intention. I’m upfront with those kind of things. Social media has allowed me to meet thousands of new and interesting people. Most of them I will never do business with or work with. However, from each and every one of them I learned something.

Because I don’t have an agenda, I probably over share giving away intel, information and business strategies because that’s just how my mind and brain works. The ideas and strategies come tumbling out even if I’m not trying. Not one to keep them inside I love just strategizing, debating and learning. While it’s probably the root of my the current negative feelings I’m experiencing from others, I don’t want to change just because I’ve encountered one or two people who are hurting.

I’ve talked about the circle jerk working in the HR and recruiting industries. Now that I’ve worked to separate myself from the evil throws of the circle jerk of influence, there seems to be a number of faux friends who just want to take their shortcomings and anger on me. These incidents creep up at strange moments and in a flash the faux friends sends a shit bomb my direction portraying me as a villain when I think they are doing nothing more than projecting. I keep telling them it’s not about me but them and how they are dealing with their own negativity, experiences and life things currently.

I guess I’m just an easy target, and I’ve always been upfront that these kind of interactions and incidents hurt me. I mean, I’m human. It’s the nature of things. I’ve experienced in their mind a great deal of success, and it’s true I’m extremely grateful for my health, my family and a successful business. However, my life is far from perfect. This year I have experienced a deep depression stemming from the loss of my baby at 11 weeks. We’ve moved twice cross country in under 12 months. This last year has been some of the saddest and hardest time of my life. However, I’m still standing and believe I’m stronger because of it than ever. I’m just not trained and experienced in dealing with so much of someone else’s negativity.

I did what I think any person would. I countered their angry, hateful and just yuck filled messages. I wished them happiness. I’m killing them with kindness and positivity. With friends like these who needs enemies.

It’s so hard to discern who is a real friend and who is just pretending. I believe I’m a good judge of character, but I’m not perfect by any means. I work to surround myself even tighter with a group of close friends, colleagues, family and peers who are focused on the same values and most importantly positivity.

Thankfully if killing them with kindness doesn’t work, there’s this great feature on social media called the block function. It’s like your own personal sage stick for cleansing but happening via social networking. You block and go on living your life with intention the way you were meant to be.

I tell myself that the path of least resistance isn’t worth taking and that those who are moving forward are just a reminder to those who are taking steps backward or are stuck that they are these things. Believe me, I’ve been in the shoes of the victim all too often. It’s hard to move forward and upward realizing that you are getting in your own way.

It’s not the haters that I’m worried about or the enemies. I believe there is a place for everyone in this industry, business or environment. Unfortunately, most people don’t feel this way. This doesn’t mean I’m not aggressive in my work efforts. I research and work like no one knows, however there is room in industries for those who do the work. It just might not be in the role, company or as important as you intended your path to be.

Yup, it’s the faux friends I’m experiencing the most resistance and just ugliness from, and their negatively and anger while upsetting reminds me that I am on the path I was intended to be.

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